Part of the reason that The One Who Knows Everything and I butt heads so often, is because I’m a know-it-all, too. So, it’s this battle of the brains/wills/egos…any time he and I have a conversation.
Especially, because that boy of mine can know-it-all me right under the table, with ridiculous accuracy! He’s good!
He got a new book from the library yesterday. It’s about the body. Gross stuff…about poop, blood, scabs, and vomit…but, educational, nonetheless! After our conversation this morning…I know he only got that book, to try to one up me, since I’ve been taking classes for nursing school.
He said, “Hey, Mom! Did you know that when we breathe. It’s like this cycle. A kinda long cycle, actually. Where our lungs breathe in oxygen. And get rid of…like…carbon dioxide, I think. Yeah, carbon dioxide. And our blood cells carry the good stuff around our body. And they carry the bad stuff out…”
Pressed for time, and patience, I interrupted him, “I know, Buddy. It’s pretty cool isn’t it? The body is amazing. That’s the kind of stuff I’ve been learning in my classes. Hurry up. Eat. You guys gotta get going.”
He went in for the kill, “Yeah. But, Mom. It took you, like, a YEAR to learn that stuff. I learned it in one paragraph.”
Suppressing my own know-it-all-ness, I agreed, “Yeah, Buddy. It seems like that, doesn’t it.” When, really, I wanted to say, “Don’t make me get out my transcript, bitch!”