Tuesday, March 16, 2010

It wasn’t me…

The people who invented Sharpie’s are assholes!  They can’t have kids.  There is no way, that they have children.  For, if they did…then ALL OF THEIR SHIT, including THEMSELVES, would be covered in Sharpie.  They would have lost their minds…and they would’ve shut down production of the most permanent marker in the universe!

I don’t know what it is about kids and Sharpies…but, they can’t resist them!!  If you have kids…and you have a Sharpie in the house…then, somewhere in, or around your home…something valuable is covered in Sharpie! 

Right now, I have an antique dresser of my great aunt’s…COVERED in Sharpie.  My laminate countertops…have Sharpie on them.   Kids love them some Sharpies!! 

Look at this…

IMG_5815

That’s the side…of my neighbor’s HOUSE!

That little shit wrote on the neighbor's house!!  He knows better than to color on our house…but, I forgot to tell him that he also shouldn’t write his name, with a SHARPIE, on the neighbor’s house!! 

You wanna hear the brilliant part of it?

Jack did it!!

He wrote his brother’s name…on the neighbor’s house…in Sharpie!  Classic shithead brother thing to do, isn’t it!  Avery was framed.  I was angry…I felt bad…I yelled at the kid…made him apologize, and offer to help clean it up, but, I just had to laugh! 

Jesica…most likely does NOT think it’s funny, in the least, and for that, I am sooooooo sorry, Jes!  I promise to get Jake and Jack to figure out a way to clean the graffiti off your house!

I love how the boys scratched it out…thinking that would cover their tracks!  

21 comments:

Stacey said...

Them boys of yours! lol

Lolidots said...

I had to put all the Sharpies up and now when I need one I can't find one because I hid them so damn well. They suck.

That is one clever boy you've got there! I love that they tried to scratch it out. Like a toddler covering their eyes so you can't see them. Just awesome.

MommyTimesTwo said...

Eliana's newest tactic to avoid detection when she's done something bad is to bring it up before I do.

Like she scribbled all over the kitchen floor tiles with pencil (although I didn't see her do it, but Josie can't write any letters and I know it wasn't me).

Then, as I was inspecting the damage, she says,

"Uh oh Mommy. It looks like SOMEONE drew all over the floor with pencil. Who would've EVER done that? I KNOW I wouldn't because I KNOW it is against the rules to draw on anything but paper with pencils. Isn't that right, Mommy? Whoever it was is REALLY going to be in trouble..."

All with the slyness of a fox and an angel face!

Millie said...

I'm sorry to be literally LOL here! I still haven't got the drawing off my white sofa, courtesy of my ds.

Wendy said...

Power washer might work. If you don't own one, you can rent an industrial type from Home Depot/Lowes or buy a cheaper one (they just aren't as strong). Ours cost less than $100 from Lowe's.

Funny story though...well, unless you are the owner of that house. I love Sharpie's but they should come with sort of lock type keypad on them to insure little hands can't use them.

Good luck on the removal process.

Wendy said...

Forgot to add in my first comment....You might also want to try a product called Amodex or rubbing alcohol/nail polish remover or even some hard liquor you have in the house (then you can take a swig while trying to remove stain). If you have brick on your house, I would just spot test before trying any products on your neighbor's brick.

Deborah said...

OMG that is hilarious! We hide the sharpies around here ;0)

Jes said...

Lol!! No prob. I just think it's funny that while the boys were getting into the sharpie's outside, my little princess was getting into them on the inside, all at the same time. Needless to say, all the sharpie's I had inside are all in the trash now :) Not sure what Jeremy did with his that the boys got into? I guess I better figure that out before someone gets into them again. :)

Adoptive Momma said...

Awesome.

My friend's son colored the tailgate of his daddy's new white truck with black sharpie. She took pictures it was hilarious. Fortunately, the magic eraser took it off. Good luck getting it off of the brick.

Taiya said...

Yep. We have Sharpies. They are put away, except when my husband uses it and leaves it out. Then Ryla grabs it and colors on my lamps, our new washer and dryer, our walls, etc... at least she hasn't tagged the neighbors house, though. :)

TexasHeather said...

Hilarious! My youngest traced the grout lines in the tile, in a rental apartment, with sharpie. Umm-hmm. That was fun. Luckily, we were able to hire someone to scrub it. Unluckily, we didn't hire that person until after I'd tried everything I knew. Not fun.

This Daddy said...

WOW. That is crazy. Time to get Jake out there with the pressure washer. One time when Tracy was pregnant, she fell asleep on the couch and one of the kids sharpie'd the kitchen counters and cabinet's. SWEEEEET

Graphic artist in the kids future

Anonymous said...

I too have small kids who love writing on things. Mr Clean's Magic eraser gets the Sharpie of the counter tops for sure (and the remote control). Not sure about the neighbors house, but it is a cheap thing to at least try. Hope it helps. I love reading about your family.
-- Stephanie in Dallas

HiHoOhio said...

OUCH! Love your blog! Glad to find you!

Kameron said...

At least he was smart enoughnot to write his own name! Nate got his own face and the back of his door the other day but it was just my dry erase marker. I still can't get it off the damn door though!

Margaret said...

Lol I love how he framed his brother. I have never heard of kids drawing on a house though with a sharpie. You kids are very imagintive that is for sure.

Kaolinmommy said...

Oh Nikki! As hilarious as this was to read, I'm sure it was horrifying to find. I HATE sharpies. Thanks for sharing.

Buncha Blue-Eyed Monkeys said...

OMG the fact that it's his brothers' name is just perfect *evil laughter* At them moment, my fridge and toy shelf have black sharpie on them. They're both white. *sigh*

Anonymous said...

They have this stuff called Sol-U-Mel stain remover from an online company called Melaleuca. Sharpies are no match for it! It's Eco-friendly and cheap :>)

Mama SeWELL said...

Ive been going through the same thing with KC & crayons. My white bed sheet was orange purple and black the other night, and it hasnt come out!
Sharpies give a whole new meaning to permanent

Erin Lutz said...

OMG. Hate sharpies!! Hairspray works to remove them. My daughter sharpied all the screens on our windows. Why??