It's Thursday...so, I hopped over to MammaKat's for something to blog about!
The Prompts:
1.) Write a limerick. I'm sick and I just woke up...I don't think so!!
2.) Normal is... Like I'm qualified to answer that!!
3.) Describe a memorable camping experience. This is the one!!
4.) What's the best thing that has happened this week? It's not over and I'm banking on Friday to be my best day!!
5.) Did you have a childhood hideout? Where? Describe it. When I recall my childhood...it only brings pain!!
6.) Words that hurt me. Sticks and stones, baby!!
I posted this one way back when I started my blog...but no one was reading it then...so, I figured I could get away with reposting it.This is the last camping trip we took...it was Father's Day weekend, last summer. It was hot...I mean hot!! Even for Texas it was hot!!! It was most definitely memorable.
Another Bullock family camping trip...another comedy of errors!
This is how it went down....
Hour 3: It didn't take long for The One Who Gets Away With Murder to get himself into a pickle. We hear horrible shrieks from the hill behind our campsite...he had fallen into a cactus, tried to get the spines out on his own and now had them in both arms, his leg and his stomach. It took about 30 minutes for The One and I to pull each of them out with the tweezers.
Hour 8: Familiar shrieks from behind the campsite...a little softer and a little higher pitched. The One Who Doesn't Say Much fell into a cactus. I thought I remembered hearing something about using duct tape to help remove the needles of a cactus. We tried it and the child went nuts...hysterically crying. Got out the trusty tweezers and after another 30 minutes...she was spine-free! I later remembered that the duct tape is good for removing fiberglass and definitely NOT good for removing cactus spines. Ooops...my bad! Sorry sweetie!
Hour10: We try to light the lantern...it's not working right and the batteries are dead in the flashlight. It's dark and we can't see a thing! After making S'mores in the dark, we decide that since we can't see and we're all worn out, we should turn in. Our air mattress is flat! To add insult to injury...the fan had fallen in the dirt during the day and it is now louder than a Harley Davidson. The kids hardly notice, but Jake and I decide to sleep in the back of the suburban.
Did I mention it was the hottest weekend in the year? It was...record high temperatures in Texas...we're talking like 105ish!!! The next morning we canoe, sweat, swim, eat, sweat, fish and sweat some more!
Hour 30: While listening to fish tales from their fishing trip, I notice something on The One Who Knows Everything's arm. It's a tick! Ewwww! I remembered hearing something about burning the tick so it will retreat and the head won't get stuck inside you when you pull it out. We fire up one of the marshmallow roasters on the grill to try to burn the tick. The boy is freaking out. Let me say this...people use the term "freaking out" pretty loosely. People are always talking about people "freaking out". Well, I now have seen someone actually "freaking out" and it's a little sad and uncomfortable to watch! TOWKE can't sit still long enough for us to burn the tick, so we resort back to the tweezers. We pull the thing out and hope that the head comes with the body.
At this point in the weekend....we're hot, we're tired, The One Who Doesn't Say Much and The One Who Gets Away With Murder are still finding cactus spines all over, The One Who Knows Everything might have Lyme disease and we just may all have to be re-hydrated intravenously. For the first time ever, we cut our trip short and at 11pm begin to disassemble our camp...we throw everything in the suburban, and in record time...we head HOME!
Moral of the story: Don't waste your money on an abundant amount of expensive camping equipment. Flashlights, lanterns, fans, air mattresses, tents...who needs them! You can buy the most important camping tool at any drug store for about a dollar. DON'T FORGET THE TWEEZERS!
12 comments:
Dude, you totally destroyed camping for your children. So lame.
I love camping.
This is so sad and funny. Your poor kids. They're probably scarred for life. No camping in their futures. No, sir.
And this is why I gave up camping. This and the bathroom in the woods thing. I'm not into it.
Remind me to never fall into a cactus.
As terrible as this sounds, I did have to laugh at the fact that there was a picture of every single one of them crying...with your husband sort of laughing beside them! What a fun-filled family vacation. Sure does make me want to go camping!
Wow, that sounds fun! I like how you made sure to capture thier pain for posterity! Ha!
that's so funny! I knew there were good reasons why I've never been quick to go on a camping trip!
We go camping lots and thankfully my boy hasn't gotten into any of this sort of trouble lol. I don't even think I've ever packed tweezers to go camping...but you better believe they will be on my list to pack now!
Sounds familiar to an experience I had as a kid, guess who prefers hotels?
Um...that's why I don't camp. The last time I slept under the stars me and a bud were fishing...I was drinking Keystone (broke college boy) he was drinking Dr. Pepper. Our lights were screwed up too so it was friggin' dark. I popped open the top and drank some DP. Now, if Dr. Pepper goes down your gullet when you're expecting the cool refreshing Keystone, it is a shock.
As he turned in he said rather loud, "I think I got the brown recluse spider out of your sleeping bag, but if you feel something crawling don't move."
I didn't move the rest of the night.
Loved it, Nikki.
---Lane
Now that was HILARIOUS!!
You have got to talk Carey into going camping. Maybe we can all meet somewhere like New Branfels and tube the river.
Bubbs
Seriously! lol - this is what I picture camping to be like all the time now. I'm such a city girl. lol.
Very funny stuff - thanks for the laugh!
I came by way of Melissa's blog as she promised me a laugh. Oh my gosh, you are killing me. I will be back ")
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