Friday, January 16, 2009

A new generation...

Sneaky Daddy touched on this in his Random Thoughts Thursday post and this particular topic BOILS MY BLOOD. So, rather than completely fill his page with my comments...I thought I'd rant about it over here!

Yes...the following post will consist of mostly ranting...consider this your warning!

I know I'm going to age at least a couple of years by simply typing these words, goes...KIDS THESE DAYS!!! Dammit...I just felt a few gray hairs sprout, my eyelids just drooped, and I think my boobs are even a little bit saggier!!!

This generation of kids that we are raising is SPOILED ROTTEN. We have officially made "self esteem" a priority over "accountability." We hear over and over...from Dr.Phil, the American Academy of Pediatrics, our teachers and principals...and even friggin be careful what you say and do to your children because it will scar them forever if you're not! I don't want my kids to have social or emotional scars...but, THEY HAVE ME FOR A MOTHER...they're pretty much fucked!!!! Aren't scars the road-map to the soul?? Isn't it the tough times that make your grow and learn and evolve? Aren't scars cool???

Now...let me back up just a bit. I'm not saying we should beat our children everyday, or call them names...or purposefully give them scars. I'm just saying that shit happens...and the earlier that you learn to accept that fact of life...the better off you'll be in the long run.

A couple of examples for you that make my head want to explode...

In the 2nd grade...The One Who Knows Everything got into a fight on the playground. Punching and wrestling and kicking this kid. TOWKE is anything but aggressive, so this kid must've really pissed him off. I don't get a phone call...nothing. TOWKE doesn't even get punished for it at school that day, at all. The principal was busy and couldn't deal with him, so his punishment would be handled the next day. The next day, they call me in for a conference. My kid is in this room with us...he's spinning in his chair, rolling his eyes, ignoring the teachers...acting like a TOTAL ASSHOLE. Aside from being totally was all I could do to keep from jumping across the table and strangling the life out of the little shit!

The principal was asking TOWKE questions, like, "Would you like to tell me how we could help you resolve this problem?"...and, "Is there anything we can do?"...and, "Would you like to tell me how you feel?" I was speechless. My kid, by the way, is still spinning, and eye-rolling and being COMPLETELY disrespectful. But, those questions!!!! Are you kidding me? "How can we help you?" If you want my opinion on how they can help my kid...get a hard pipe-hitting brother to stand over him with a wooden paddle in his hand, beating it against the desk, scaring the living daylights out of him. That's what happened to me when I went to the principal's office...FOR TALKING IN THE HALLWAY...not for GETTING IN A FIGHT!!! I turned out just fine...don'tcha think??? I know corporal punishment is a touchy issue...but, I didn't say he had to beat my kid...just scare the shit out of him!!! My kid learned NOTHING from the school that day...he did, however, learn A LOT from his daddy when he got home!!!

My next big issue, while on a smaller scale, is still proof positive of our spoiled generation. Video games!!!

Do your remember our first Nintendo's? Mario, Contra, Zelda...all that good stuff. You had THREE lives. You had THREE lives to beat eight worlds with four levels each! So, your only option was to practice...practice...practice and become a badass at the game. We didn't have memory cards to save our hard work so that the next time we turn the game on, we simply pick up where we left off. No, we started over from the beginning EVERY SINGLE TIME. We didn't have the internet for cheat codes and crap like that, either. The Contra cheat did know...up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-B-A-B-A-Select-Start...hell, that was a feat in itself...just putting that code in the right way! But, couldn't beat Contra without that needed damn-near every one of those 30 lives!!!

I digress...

Have you seen the video games out now? The Lego Star Wars games are The One Who Gets Away With Murder's favorites. You have the little 5 hearts at the top and as you get hit, they diminish...I like that. But, when you get hit the final time and your hearts are gone and your Lego guy explodes and all your hard earned gold coins fly all over the you know what happens next? Do you have to start over? Do you lose all your coins? HELL NO...that might make our kids have self-esteem issues and might make them become serial killers. NO...when that reappear with full heart-strength...all your coins are on the ground in front of just go pick them right back the EXACT same spot you died!!! What is that teaching our kids???? Nothing about adversity, or determination, or stick-to-it-tiveness, or hard work, or practice.

I know...I shouldn't rely on Nintendo, or the school to teach my kids these things...and, believe me, I don't!

Let me say this...for those of you in the schools, in the trenches and on the front lines with MY KIDS (God help you), all day long...please don't think I'm blaming you. I know you just have to cover your asses. Because for every parent like me...who is begging them to stick-it to my kid when he acts up...there are too many parents who are at the schools complaining..."What did my kid do? You better not punish him?" Taking it all the way up the ladder if their Johnny gets so much as a time out for making sexual advances on a kindergartner!!!

You wanna know what else...when I was a kid...I had to walk to school...everyday...up hill...both the snow.....


Kameron said...

Barefoot too right?? I was just having the conversation of lack of respect and accountability in the younger generation. It's not even just the kids in elementary school, I'm talking only 5-6 years younger than me. I taught Micro lab and had never seen such blatant disrespect for professors in my life. I had to be a nazi just to get them to listen. I litterally started the first day with an iron fist and scared the daylights out of them. I hadn't done that the first semester and they walked all over me.

I could write an entire post about this too, but there was such a different expectation when we were younger. We respected adults and people in authoritative positions and, yeah we might have been a tiny bit lippy just like any kid, but we didn't question and fight against it like they do now. I know I will be raining my son to be respectful and when he gets out of line I will bring him back in.

Unfortunately parents who had strict parents themselves sometimes try to be their kids freakin' BFF instead of their parent. My kids don't need to be my best friend, they need to have a consistant parent who guides them.

***steps down from the soap box***

Mama SeWELL said...

Amen sista to that! I have a 13 yo old cousin who will not wear ANYTHING from Wal-Mart because they're not poor. And her mom lets her get away with it. I wouldve taken every stitch of Hollister, AE clothing & replaced it with Faded Glory items like nobodys business.
And how in the world do you remember the Contra cheat codes? You mustve had grown up w/ brothers or cousions too. Thats just to hilarious this morning. Making me feel old!

heidi said...


And yk what? My 9 year old is about to have a very rude awakening if she doesn't get her act together. I;m thankful that she's polite and respetful to everyone else - but if she rolls her eyes and huffs at me one. more. time. she's going to spend some time alone writing me an essay on respect.

Kimmy said...

You definitely said it! One of the things that pisses me off that some parents say is "My child would NEVER do that." Bullshit!!

I am definitely old school in my house and if my child acts up in public, I will spank her. I don't give a shit! I'm not abusing my child. There IS a fine line with spanking and abusing. I was spanked as a child and I think I turned out really good. Never took drugs, never been in jail, you name it. I'll be damned if my child turns out like those snotty-nosed brats out there!!!

Jennifer said...

Preach it! I was just thinking about this exact thing this morning over coffee. I think that is these kids would get a spanking or wash their mouth out with REAL soap. When I say spanking, I am not talking beat your kids in anger - but a nice reality check. When I say soap, I mean a little bit to taste it and know they should choose their words over the soap. Okay, now let me step off the soap box with y'all ;-) Glad to hear there are mothers like you out there not making excuses for their kids.

Lane said...

Love the post. I will have to say without question as a person on the front lines, it isn't the local teaching staff or the administrations that are responsible for this madness. It's just a small part and parcel of where our society is going.

I love the video game example by the way. I do love the memory card now, by the way. But, I'm with you on the whole if you screwed up you lost four hours of hard work. Maybe that's the cure. No memory card until your nineteen. You need to pay your dues to get your card.

I will have to admit as you probably can guess, I have a lot of thoughts on this subject...I probably will save them until April when our state mandated tests come...when I am totally fed up.

Thanks for the plug, Nikki...and I had seen the SNL thing...AWESOME!!

kristi said...

Hey, me too!!

And I had to go outside and keep myself entertained. I never said, "I'm bored!" Or I would have gotten b-slapped.