Let me take you back 20 years...
For those of you who may be younger than me...and 20 years takes you back to a embryonic, or fetal , or even a seminal stage in your life...I just have one thing to say...FUCK YOU...move on. This post is not for you! Leave us age-ed folks alone and let us reminisce about our youth. Let us remember days when we didn't need things like Weight Watchers, eye-glasses, coffee, moisturizer, hours in the day, peace and quiet, and anti-depressants. You'll get there one day, yourself...and when you do, I'll laugh my ass off. I may be in a nursing home drinking my dinner through a tube, with orderlies wiping my ass...but, by God...I will be laughing!!!
Back to my post...
When I was...about...well, let's just say younger. I was on the tennis team and took lessons in the evenings in a small neighboring town along the interstate. One night, after our lesson, my friends parents took us to McDonald's for dinner. We noticed a huge bus outside, but didn't think much of it. When we got inside, we were the only ones there and approached the counter to place our McOrder. When, lo and behold...guess who walked in and got in line behind us? Milli FUH-KIN Vanilli!!! I know, I know...they were fakes...but, this was BEFORE they were outed as fakes. So, it was exciting. We're whispering and giggling and pointing...just like school girls...daring each other to ask if it's really them. We did...and they were! Their manager offered an autograph, so my friends mom dug through her purse and offered up a bank deposit slip for each of us and a pen.
I remember when Milli...well, maybe it was Vanilli...hell I don't know...I remember when one of them handed the autograph back to me...we shared a moment. Our eyes met, and I knew this was what he was thinking....
But, as fate would have it...my Quarter-pounder with cheese, no lettuce, tomato or onion, with extra pickles...was ready and I had to move on. I'm not gonna lie...the pain in his eyes was heartbreaking. As I walked past the statue of the guy with the flaming red hair and pimpin' yellow jumpsuit, I turned back and looked over my shoulder....this was what I heard him say....
So, there you have it...a brief
12 comments:
You should offer a free pack of depends with each of your posts! I 'bout pissed myself reading that one!
Ha ha ha ha! Love the beginning of your post. :)
What a cool experience you had. I can't believe they stopped at McDonald's though. That is funny in itself.
Too funny! Aww...the days of Milli Vanilli. Although, I was a WHAM girl...until George came out...lol! I still love him anyway!
what the hell would they be doing in our neck of the woods? That's hilarious. I so wish I could have been there. Oh, and you are so hilarious with your old lady stuff.
kam - i'll see if they'll sponsor me!
jill - yeah...i'm thinking the REAL voiced behind milli vanilli were getting the bigger cut...they were spotted at the steak house down the street!
kimmy - george, as in boy...if so, notsomuch...george, as in michael...then, oh yeah...i didn't even care that he was gay!
heidi - MY old lady stuff...MY old lady stuff...the last i checked, you were just a hair older than me...and it's probably a grey hair, too!! LOL! i'm just yanking your chain!!
Well, I for one am not surprised that they had to stop at McDonalds, the fries are the shiznit!
Very funny post, brings back memories of time when it was ok for men to wear shoulder pads.
Oh i can go back 20 years and hang with you! How fun that must have been for you!
Which one is the cute one? Milli or Vanilli?
Remember Color Me Badd? And that time they were on 90210 and David, Donna, Kelly and Brenda snuck into the hotel to meet them and Donna caught her mom cheating on her dad?
I LOVED those songs too! All this time I thought that crush you had was on me? Damn Kammy bout pissed herself, but I got pissed on. I really thought we had somethun. can ya see what fanger ima hodin up?
Tim
I'm TOTALLY singing. HA! I loved Milli Vanilli man. I was heartbroken when I found out they were fakes.
Ok Nikki Vanilli,
There is an award over at The Fort for you!
Love and Prayers,
Tim
Ahhh, I loved Milli Vanilli.... I would sing & jam to some of that back in the day... I am pretty sure I cried real tears, when I found out they were big fat fakers.
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