The other night, we were hanging with a fried who was recently divorced, and had a bit of a nasty custody battle. I think it's safe to say that most custody battles are pretty nasty...just a guess.
We were chatting, and he was recounting a story when his angry ex-wife called CPS on him, and he had to deal with that shit.
He said that when the worker was questioning him, she asked these two questions, that I find deeply, deeply disturbing...
"Do you take your children to eat at Hooter's, and do you think that's appropriate?"
Which, I find ruh-diculous, but, not near as ruh-diculous as the next question she asked...
"Do you take your children to church on Sundays?"
I thought my friend was making this shit up, because I cannot fathom this question really being asked by a social worker, employed by a government agency, in the interest of the protection of children from abuse and neglect.
On the issue of Hooters…can someone please explain to me how taking your child to a restaurant where scantily clad, big breasted women serve you chicken bits...is considered abuse?!?
God made boobs, no? He placed them right underneath a woman's face, yes? They were created, to be noticed, am I right? Well, and they were created to feed babies, but, men diggin’ them the most was a kind of side-effect of that. Maybe an accidental, or unintentional side effect, but a side effect, nonetheless!
Hooters is simply showcasing God's handiwork, if you ask me. The place is like an art gallery, for titties. I bet Jesus himself would eat at Hooters, and before he ate his hot wings, I bet he would pray...
”Dad is great, Dad is good, let us thank him for the boobs...AMEN!”
On the church thing…LAWDY, LAWDY, I don’t know if I even want to get started. How it is any interest of the city, state, government, or Fire Marshall Bill, hell...GOD HIMSELF, whether mine, or my children’s asses are in a pew come Sunday?
Alright, I'll give it to you, God may have some interest in that one…but, Child Protective Services? WTF?!?
I know that by deciding to not raise our children in church, we are choosing to accept the consequences of that decision. Like, our children being ridiculed, or teased, or damned to hell on a daily basis. Those are consequences that I expect, from our decision. But, something that I am not prepared to face, nor, will I ever be, is arguing with the state on whether or not my decision to sleep in on Sundays, can be considered abuse, and may be used against me in a court of law!!!
I guess it’s not really anything I have to worry with, because I can’t really see Jake, 1) fighting me for custody of our children….or vice versa!! It’ll be more like, “Nah, you can have ‘em. Really. No…you take them. No fucker, I nursed them round the clock and changed all those diapers…you’re taking them, and THAT’S FINAL!” And then, I would tell the judge that I’m a prostitute!! 2) using it against me that my kids aren’t in church. I’m agnostic. He’s an atheist. If anyone’s gong to hell, it’s him!! At least I believe in some kinda God!!
I't’s just another reason that I’m not getting divorced!
Because if I had to deal with that kind of questioning by the state…me not taking my kids to church would be a non-issue. The bigger issue in the case against my fitness as a parent would be the fact that I murdered a social worker with her own clipboard!!