A gunshot wound....

Here's a good one for you...

Let me back this story up....

Jack got an airsoft gun for his birthday..why we thought it was a good idea to arm this child...I'll never know and, yes, it was a grandma gift...Avery got one too and before we sent them out in the backyard to kill each other we thought we'd test it out to see how bad the bullets hurt. So, I volunteer...Jake's testosterone kicks in and he realizes he can't let his wife take one for the team...so he takes several steps across the yard, turns his back to me...and with just the slightest bit of glee...I shoot him right between the shoulder blades. Jake starts hollering, jumping up and down, swatting at his back like there's a swarm of bees after him and screams..."NEVER, EVER SHOOT EACH OTHER..." We check the site of impact and there is a whelp the size of a nickel and a bright purple/red blood blister the size of a pencil eraser right in the center....it continues to sting and the point is proven to the kids...they will never shoot one another.

Now...to yesterday...I was putting Jack's air rifle up and glanced down noticing the bright green bullet ready for fire...I thought I should empty it, but then thought, nah...they won't shoot it at anyone, it's fine...a thought I later regret...I check the safety, then put it on his shelf. The kids had just gotten home from school and I was lecturing about something...to all three of the kids...Jack, apparently sick of my ranting, grabs his rifle, points directly at me, says "Hey Mom" I turn and look, he fires....and....at point blank range, I was shot right in the ass!!!!! So, I start hollering, jumping up and down and swatting my ass like there's a swarm of bees after me. I remember glancing at the kids and the look of fear on their faces...was absolutely priceless. Jack was terrified, he ran and hid in his room...Avery and Lily ran as far from the scene as they could possibly be and my husband, my defender, my protector....sits on the couch hysterically laughing. In his defense...from his perspective, I'm sure it was HILARIOUS. I would've taken pix, but it was my ass...so, I thought I would spare you all!!!

Ahhhh, the joys of motherhood!!! Avery wants a .22 for Christmas...yeah...I DON'T THINK SO!!!